2003

His Master's Voice; I hope this one speaks for itself
Dimbo; No further comment
A Damascus Road; Dubya suddenly announces that he won't invade Syria after all, following much chest beating. Could this be related to counsel form more cautious minds than his in the GOP back home? He does, after all, face a re-election campaign next year, and one invasion too far may not "play too well in Peoria"
Adam & Eve; Can the pre-lapsarian Dubya be tempted into the earthly delight of war with a hapless Iraq? Iran, Syria, Libya and North Korea could also be on the cards but Iraq seems to be first on the list - he has Daddy's job to finish, after all. Fellow "neo-con" cabinet members Wolfowitz and Rumsfeld look on as Dick Cheney presents his impressive casus belli to Dubya. Blair will act as Dubya's fig leaf in negotiations with the UN. After a painting by Mabuse (Jan Gossaert); Adam and Eve in Paradise c. 1525
Campbell Grave; Jack Straw and Greg Dyke must have thought they'd buried him, but Campbell returns from the dead with bravado accusations aimed at the BBC
Period of Reflection; Tony Blair solemnly asks for a "period of reflection" after the death of WMD adviser David Kelly. Meanwhile the BBC is forced to admit that Kelly was their sole source claiming Campbell ordered a re-write of the Iraq Dossier, and things look a little brighter for the No.10 team. But Kelly, in a phone call to a friend before his death speaks of "dark actors" at play. We can only wonder who he meant.
John the Builder; John Prescott makes hay while the sun shines and makes ready to take over the reigns while Blair is away on holiday. He announces with his usual blustering eloquence that thousands of affordable homes for key-workers will be built all over the green belt of south-east England, specifically the "Thames Gateway". Can he fix it? Hmm..
Cockfight; No.10 press officer Tom Kelly's e-mail describing the Campbell-Gilligan stand-off as a "game of Chicken" seems a little understated. Who's the chicken anyway?
Russian Dolls; Blair's hands are looking bloodier and bloodier as the layers of deception are removed
Gadaffi Carrot; It emerges that Gadaffi has been in secret negotiaions with the 'Lovers of Freedom' for two years. He has been promised a lifting of sanctions and the "carrot" of US investment if he agrees to cancel his WMD programmes and provides information on terrorists. In the background lurks a "stick"; the threat of ending up like the sorry figure of Saddam.